Happy New Year 2023…(Observed!)

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying ‘Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

“He who was seated on the throne said “I am making everything new!’ Then He said, “‘Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.'” (Revelation 21:1-5)

I missed the usual “Goodbye” to the old year with its remembrance of those lost to The Herbal Hare Tomestead on New Year’s Eve; I was in bed long before midnight. We did have one loss. And I feel it keenly: the last of my bunnies, Miss Tumbleweed, died over the summer months. She was 10 years’ old, a good age for a rabbit but, knowing she lived to a great age, doesn’t make the loss any easier to bear. She spent the last couple of years of her life without another rabbit for companionship but, considering where we’ve been financially, investing in more rabbits would’ve been foolish. When her brother, Sweet Pea, died, I moved her cage into the kitchen so she could at least be in the thick of things instead of sitting lonesome in what had been the rabbit room (doesn’t every good homestead have one of those?). Now we’re The Herbal Hare Tomestead without the hare (rabbit).

(Insert heavy sigh here)

I miss having rabbits. I enjoyed the nightly “bunny time” when I would let the bunnies out of their cages to stretch their legs, try a few binks, and explore. I usually had a book in my hand…though the usual ankle-head butts from one of the buns set it down again. It was the ultimate “down time” for me. I miss grooming them, too, though it could often be stressful (not all bunnies like to be handled too much). There will be more bunnies at this homestead again. In due time…

I don’t usually make New Year’s resolutions; they rarely stick.

This year is different…and I have every intention of making it stick:

This year I am hoping to grow my relationship with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. (Yes, and I can already hear the Adversary whispering his lies…)

My faith has taken a beating these last few years. I feel a little like Job, who lost so much, went through so many trials and tribulations, only to be given even more than he had had to begin with. I’m holding onto that hope. However, the thought of losing–comforts, things I’ve worked for, places that have meaning, and especially loved ones, like Tumbleweed–is a tough pill to swallow. But I’m leaving it all in his hands. Thy will be done.

Phew! That was tough even to write…

He’s been in my corner so much lately, helping me to navigate this foreclosure process; protecting my family though this fixer-upper has become unsafe and scary to live in; giving me full-time employment in a tanking job market, and showing me who is really in my corner on the human side of this equation. Despite present hardships, I have hope in my heart and feel blessed beyond measure. Blessed be the name of the Lord! It’s time to truly walk by faith. I want that closer relationship to Him. It’s no kind of life without Him.

Trust.

I have so little of it. Such is not uncommon when you’ve grown up with alcoholism in the home, certain types of abuse, etc., the dysfunctionality of such a home. I stick my toes in the waters–new jobs, a path towards one of many dreams, even relationships of every shape and size–only to pull them back out again. I procrastinate. I allow fear to rule over me, distrust and lack of confidence. Those dreams are for other people. More importantly, I forget to ask Him how He can use me. How may I serve YOU, Lord? How may I further your kingdom here on earth? Are the dreams you’ve put on my heart part of that kingdom? What if I gave everything to those dreams and let you take the reins to where they lead? Can I find that measure of trust needed deep down inside?

I can’t…but He can.

I think I have this year’s song of the year, too: What If I Gave Everything? by Casting Crowns. You may give a listen here:

May God bless you & keep you!

Tumbleweed 2012 – 2022