Category: Christianity

19th century, Brothers & Sisters, Christianity, Healing, Herbs, History, Holistic Health, Homesteading, illness, Nature, Organic, Recipes, Spices

Age…and Digest Tea

Lisa Burbank

“White hair is a crown of glory and is seen most among the godly.” (Proverbs 16:31)

Ever since I broke the habit of rising at 3:30 each day to write, I’ve been struggling to get back to that schedule. If I don’t write this blog early in the a.m., it usually doesn’t happen. And 3:30 leaves me a few hours for blogging, working on my book, some yoga and prayer before the farm starts clamoring for breakfast. However, it’s a tough schedule to maintain even under the best of circumstances.

This morning?

A 2:00 a.m. attack of acid reflux, which triggered an asthma attack, which had me running to the bathroom because I’m rapidly becoming one of those ladies that pees when she sneezes, wheezes or coughs, of which I was batting 2 out of 3. Middle age is starting to peek over the horizon in the rearview mirror.

Welcome to the silver years!

After relieving myself, I attempted to go back to bed. 2 a.m. is a bit early even for me. But acid reflux continued to rage and then, alas, hot flashes, too. Ay caramba! I got back up a little after 3 after tossing and turning, burning and flashing, brewed a cuppa my favorite Chai tea (of which I’m wondering if the herbalist should’ve elected to brew her digest tea instead of being so much of a creature of habit…) and voila! And, while I may have given the recipe for my digest tea in an earlier post, it’s one that is worth repeating for any who may have missed it.

Digest tea is made with equal parts Chamomile (Matricaria recutita) and Fennel seeds (Foeniculum vulgare). I typically use a tablespoon each of the dried herbs. Then add about 1/8 – 1/4 teaspoon of ginger and just a pinch of cardamom. All are excellent digestive aids.

Chamomile is an excellent brew all by itself for digestive complaints. It relieves diarrhea, abdominal cramping (antispasmodic), flatulence, colic in babies and, when used in conjunction with these other herbs and spices, tends to calm my acid reflux. It is also good for menstrual cramps, nervousness and insomnia (Tierra, pp. 110-111, 1998).

During my tenure in living history, I learned that both fennel seeds and caraway seeds used to be candied and placed on the dinner table to alleviate gas and the abdominal pains that often come with eating certain foods, or overindulging. Though caraway seeds could easily be substituted, I prefer the slight licorice-y taste of the fennel seeds. Fennel is also good for treating colic and can be used as an expectorant to help expel excess mucus. It is often used in “herb formulas containing strong laxatives to prevent griping” (Tierra, pp. 76-77, 1998).

Ginger (Zingiber officinale) is, in my opinion anyway, a herbal powerhouse. It is good for anything pertaining to the stomach, intestines, and for the circulatory system. It relieves nausea (which often comes with acid reflux) and indigestion. Combined with honey and lemon, it soothes sore throats and helps promote sweating in the treatment of colds and flus. It works well as a natural pain reliever for muscle and joint pain, including the pain that accompanies arthritis.

Lastly, cardamom (Elettaria cardamomum) is another carminative, which means it relieves gas and acid reflux. It has a warming effect on the body and helps to relive diarrhea, colic and headaches.

These four herbs combined not only relieve my acid reflux and help with all things digestive, they also taste delicious. It’s one of the few herbal teas that I can drink without any sweetening, though I often add a spot of honey, which can have a soothing effect of its own on the digestive tract.

When making any herbal tea, you want the water hot, not boiling. I tend to bring my water just to a boil, turn it off and let it sit for about 5 minutes before pouring it over the dried herbs. If the water is too hot, it will destroy the medicinal properties of the herbs. Cover the mug, or tea pot, and allow the herbs to steep for about 20 minutes. Strain and enjoy! If using honey, I typically add it to the cup right after I pour the water over the herbs and allow it to steep along with the herbs.

A word of caution: Avoid using any plastic vessels or nonstick cookware as they may leach into your tea. Cast iron may also adversely affect your brew. And never use the microwave! I use stainless steel pans and kettles for all of my herbs, and ceramic mugs/tea pots for brewing.

As both cardamom and ginger are two of the herbs used to make Chai tea, maybe I’m not so far off with my favorite brew this morning after all but, I’m also thinking maybe I should start incorporating a cup of digest tea before meals…instead of hoping I’ll remember at 2 a.m. when acid reflux is already wreaking havoc. As much as I am enjoying watching the sunrise and hearing the opening chorus of wild birds and pet roosters, acid reflux would definitely fall under the heading of a “rude awakening”.

May God bless you & keep you!

The FDA has not evaluated these statements. This blog post is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any diseases.

REFERENCES

Tierra, Michael (1998). The Way of Herbs. Pocket Books, a division of Simon & Schuster, Inc. New York, NY.

Abuse, Animals, Appreciation, Books, Brothers & Sisters, Christianity, Creativity, Exhaustion, Faith, God/Jesus, Gratitude, Healing, Homesteading, Prayer, Writing

When In Doubt

Lisa Burbank

“For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. You will find me when you seek me, if you look for me in earnest.” (Jeremiah 29:11-13)

The kitchen faucet, which has needed replacing for some time now, started leaking in earnest last week…i.e. we had a flood in the kitchen. The nosy neighbors who hide in my hedges, craning their neck over the wall, the same ones who have challenged zoning, are proving to be partiers. Bonfires, loud music, swearing, screaming, shouting until all hours of the night…and there’s less than an acre between us. Then the trunk of my car wouldn’t close Saturday night so I had to wire it shut. On the way to pick up dinner last night, the wire broke and I had to pull into a parking lot and try to rewire it. I eventually had to pull some baling twine off of the bale of hay in the trunk and jury rig it until I could get back home. After fiddling with it some more, I finally got it closed…only to approach opening it again with much trepidation. When I got home, Felicity, my female Nigerian Dwarf goat was shaking like a leaf. Chester, the male, got a little rough with his head-butting. No major injury but she’s a little stiff and sore; I had to separate them.

This could be the sequel to Francesca Battistelli’s song, “This is the Stuff”. As I plan to walk to work as long as the weather holds, I pray I won’t have to worry overmuch about misplaced keys or doing 45 in a 35 mph zone, as she intones.

But, yes, this is the stuff that drives me crazy.

Foreclosure is still looming. I still haven’t found a zoning attorney to help me with my current issues. With bad credit, finding a new homestead looks pretty grim. My paltry part-time paycheck, for which, yes, I am eternally grateful to have even that, will take me a month of Sundays to save for an acre or two of land. Then I have to build a house.

And I’m stressing over having to change a faucet on my own!

Having these added issues, no matter how seemingly small, just adds insult to injury. I feel a crying jag coming on. Mainly because I’ve lost my cool more often than I’d like to admit.

Hope flew out the window last night. The thought of ending it crept in. Only for a moment but it was enough for me to stop and take stock of things. I am so completely overwhelmed. They say He doesn’t give us more than we can bear. I don’t believe that’s entirely true. He never gives us more than He can bear, not what we can bear. We can’t bear all that much on our own. And maybe that’s what I’m trying to do: shoulder it alone. The problem is I don’t know how to let go and let God. I don’t know how to trust, to believe that He really does have my best interest at heart. I don’t know how to surrender my will to His for fear that I will lose everything that truly matters to me…not as idols, but I’m still that abused little girl expecting a punitive father to strike me down.

And yet there must still be a nugget of hope somewhere in my heart because I keep envisioning that homestead up in Maine, Vermont, upstate New York, maybe Tennessee or Missouri to be closer to my brother and best friend. Ohio has popped up on the radar, too. Yeah, maybe just dreams. But, to be truly without hope, those dreams would be cast aside. Instead, the yearning grows stronger.

Enough that I have signed up to work with a writing/career coach. She is a friend of a friend that I met at a Christian writer’s workshop the summer before Covid-19. We have stayed in touch through social media. I realize how truly overwhelmed I have been with this blog (I’ve strayed away a time or two from its original purpose), with both books, with starting a career as a writer and not knowing where to go, where to start. I aced the classes. I have the degree. Now where do I go from here? And I don’t know a lot of writers locally. Before Covid-19 I had considered starting a local writers’ workshop that would meet every week. Covid-19 nixed that for the moment. I realize I need that support, that accountability, some basic structure and feeling that I am getting somewhere as I navigate through my first novel, or two.

As for my living situation? It may be a while before He reveals where He is leading me. I suppose I need an accountability partner there, too. Someone who routinely asks me, “Did you call x, y, z this week? Did you have a chance to do ___________?” It is far too easy to slide back into a depressed slump, to cave in to the apathy of worldly struggles. To feel, yes, overwhelmed by the magnitude of this mountain I’m being asked to climb.

And He is asking me to climb it or He wouldn’t keep bringing me back to it. I feel like He is asking me to take all of this knowledge He has given me, the resources He has revealed and put them to use, to take advantage of them…and to shake off the underlying feeling that I am not worthy of His grace. That’s the peak of the mountain…learning to believe He loves me and I don’t have to earn it.

This yearning-to-be a professional writer, homesteader and prepper is reaching out and asking for your prayers, your positive vibes/energies, some kind intentions. I’ve been in this place for most of the last 12 years; enough is enough. May God send His blessings upon each and every one of you, too!

Amen!

REFERENCES

Battistelli, Francesca (2011). “This is the Stuff.” Hundred More Years. Fervent Records, Curb Records, and Word Entertainment.

Animals, Appreciation, Christianity, Compassion, Family, Healing, illness, Introvert, Love, Scripture, Self-esteem, Writing

The Need for Solitude

Lisa Burbank

“Don’t be selfish; don’t live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. Don’t just think about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and in what they are doing.” (Philippians 2:3-4)

Yup, that title does seem to contradict the passage from Scripture that I shared today. But it’s relevant.

I’m my worst enemy. I beat up on myself constantly, feeling selfish for taking a couple of hours each morning to write…because that’s what I do. That’s what makes me, well, me. I’ve also been feeling guilty for going to bed a little earlier, rather than sitting up with Mom (night owl), that I might get up early without sacrificing sleep. I feel like the bad daughter for getting together with friends by myself…even when Mom reassures me that I should be getting out with my friends once in awhile (Mom doesn’t drive, by the way).

But you know what I’m starting to realize?

I have less time and consideration for others when I don’t take those all-important times for myself. I catch myself zoning out at work when others are talking. I have to curb the rise of impatience when Mom, who has been home all day alone, anxiously relays the latest coronavirus news she read online. My time with the animals becomes the bare minimum of feeding and watering, maybe a quick scratch behind the ears, before I “escape” behind a book or a YouTube video. I snap. I huff out a breath of impatience. In short, I’m as prickly as a hedgehog on steroids, leaving everyone else hurt and bewildered by my inattention.

I’ve blogged about being an introvert before. I am often a chatterbox with those I’m closest to but, even with loved ones, an endless barrage of people-time makes me physically ill. I’m not a snob, or anti-social; it’s just part of being an introvert. Crowds make me feel lonely. Constant socializing feels overwhelming. I’m learning more and more how important it is to find a healthy balance so that quality time with loved ones truly is.

Now, if I could only silence that obnoxious tape playing in my head that tells me how horrible I am for needing that solitude. The way I see it after proofreading this, the real selfishness would be to give the hedgehog a few more steroids.

May God bless you & keep you!

Brothers & Sisters, Christianity, Culture, Diversity, Enlightenment, Faith, Humanity First, Love, Religion, Scripture, Spirituality, Understanding

Ramadan Mubarak to All of My Muslim Brothers and Sisters

Lisa Burbank

“I will raise them up a prophet from among their brethren, like unto thee; and I will put My words in his mouth, and he shall speak unto them all that I shall command him” (Deuteronomy 18:18)

As I watch the sky pale from outside my home office window, enjoying a cup of my favorite Chai tea, I cannot help but say a prayer for my Muslim friends who, by now, have finished sohour and will not eat or drink–even water–until after sundown this evening. This second meal of the day during Ramadan is called iftar and often begins with dates and/or sweet drinks. These give Muslims, who have been fasting since before sunrise, a boost.

Sohour is the meal that Muslims eat together in the earliest hours of morning–or perhaps latest hours of night, as some may view it–before the sun rises. Families awaken super early to share this meal, something I cannot even imagine. I struggled–and failed miserably–to give up only sweets/sugar during Lent. Abstaining from all sustenance from sunrise to sunset elicits a slight shudder; I am the proverbial bear when I don’t eat. Which also leaves me questioning where my own faith lacks. Could I endure such? And, perhaps, “endure” is not the operative word here. According to one source, Muslims are supposed to fast with niyyah, or intention. This means that they must not simply abstain from food but “intend in heart that the fast is meant to be a worship for Allah alone” (Klein, 2021).

I am always amazed at the beauty of traditions that are followed by each religion and/or culture. Though I am born-again Christian, and a practicing Catholic, I have always been intrigued with what others believe and how they worship the God of their consciousness…even to “practicing” some of these traditions myself for short periods of time. Not to make light of such traditions, but because I have always believed that the true way to peace is to learn about each other. And the best way to learn is to submerge yourself, as least as much as one is comfortable, in that culture, tradition, religion, and/or language.

Case in point: I studied at the Rhode Island School for the Deaf for several semesters. After the first couple of weeks of introduction with a hearing/speaking instructor, we were assigned to a Deaf teacher. We learned Sign quickly…if for no other reason then to get our next homework assignment. I learned so well that I found myself reading body language even outside of the classroom…much to the chagrin of an over-eager swain in a local night club one night who laid on the b.s. like peanut butter.

But I digress…

So what is Ramadan?

According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, it is celebrated, or observed, as the “commemoration of Muhammad’s ‘receipt of the first Qur’anic revelation towards the end of the fasting month of Ramadan’,” (Brittanica, n.d.). Like my own tradition of Lent, it is a time for drawing nearer to God (or so it seems in it’s willing sacrifice for Him). (And, I hope, if there is any error here, that any Muslim brethren reading this will post a comment below to enlighten us further (smile)).

That being said, Ramadan Mubarak to all of my Muslim brothers and sisters.

And, to all of my brothers and sisters of every faith and tradition, no matter your calling, or beliefs, as always, may God bless you & keep you!

REFERENCES

Klein, Allison (2021). “How Ramadan Works.” Howstuffworks. http://www.people.howstuffworks.com/aculture-traditions/holidays-other/ramadan2.htm

Brothers & Sisters, Christianity, Creativity, Culture, Diversity, Enlightenment, History, Holidays, Nostalgia

F-F-F-Foolin’

Lisa Burbank

“Wisdom is a fountain of life to those possessing it, but a fool’s burden is his folly.” (Proverbs 16:22)

I’ve dedicated some time to learning more about holidays from other cultures and/or religions. I’ve explored Wiccan and Pagan traditions, Judaism, Muslim, Native American and Hindu festivals. However, I’ve neglected the “holiday” we celebrate today: April Fool’s Day!

Holiday is in quotation marks because I don’t know of a single country, municipality, or corporation that gives April Fool’s Day as a day off to celebrate or commemorate. Instead, the fun and games are often made manifest on the job or in the school. Most of the time these manifestations are harmless, perhaps even corny in their execution, but sometimes they’re a little more of a, shall we say, nuisance?

I am reminded of one April Fool’s Day in my early-20’s when a local DJ announced that Bon Jovi was coming to town and tickets were going on sale that morning. My friends and I piled into the car, raced into the downtown area–complete with bursts of road rage towards anyone who got in our way–only to find it was a hoax. Our juvenile selves were quite put out by it. (Ironically, today I couldn’t care less if Bon Jovi was coming to town; how times change!)

Anyway, from what I was able to find yesterday, this holiday actually goes back several centuries and no one is truly certain exactly when or how it was started. However, the general consensus is that April Fool’s came about when we switched from the Julian calendar to the Georgian calendar. April 1st used to be New Year’s Day by that calendar and, for those “fools” who continued to celebrate and wish everyone a “Happy New Year” on April 1st, even years after we rolled calendars, April 1st came to be known as April Fool’s Day. Pranks were then started to “prove” just how foolish and gullible a body was. According to Wikipedia (which, albeit, is not always the most reliable…), in Scotland, the day has traditionally been celebrated by tacking signs on another person’s derriere saying things like “Kick me!” And we always thought Looney Tunes came up with that one on their own.

April Fool’s!

May God bless you & keep you!

Brothers & Sisters, Christianity, Culture, Diversity, Healing, History, Holidays, Human rights, Humanity First, Lent, Religion, Scripture, Understanding

Falling Behind

Lisa Burbank

“Now as for you, dear brothers, who are waiting for the Lord’s return, be patient, like a farmer who waits until the autumn for his precious harvest to ripen. Yes, be patient. And take courage, for the coming of the Lord is near.” (James 5:7-8)

I missed the First Day of Spring, Ostara, and Nowruz greetings this past Saturday. I missed St. Patrick’s Day, St. Joseph’s Day, Presidents’ Day, Lent, Valentine’s Day, Groundhog’s Day, St. Brigid’s, Candlemas and Imbolc, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Day and even New Year’s Day–including the Chinese New Year (2021 is the Year of the Dragon, by the way!). I’m probably missing a few others, too.

As for the usual commitments, I never picked a theme song for the year. However, that being said, in light of all the escalating hate crimes, I think I’m going to keep the collaboration between Mandisa, Kirk Franklin and Tobymac, “We All Bleed the Same,” for another year. It is, sadly, still befitting. And something we should all remember.

Our Asian brothers and sisters are NOT responsible for coronavirus coming to these shores; please stop beating them up or shooting them in their places of business. It is especially heartbreaking to see that it is mostly the elderly, and women, who seem to be the targets of such cowardice.

Our Black brethren deserve to feel the same sense of safety and security walking down the streets as their Caucasian brothers and sisters; ditto for feeling safe in their homes. There’s a reason why we should never forget names like Breonna Taylor and Ahmaud Arbery. Our Black brethren also deserve the right to vote…and to have that vote count. If your candidate, whether in the House or Senate, the Presidency, or local government, lost because more people voted this time around than in any other point in history, suppressing that vote is not the answer. Scratching your head until you come up with real solutions to the issues that matter most to Americans should, instead, be your course of action. Your candidate lost because they demonstrated more concern with Party authoritarianism than We, the People they were hired to serve (eh, we’re beyond Party “loyalty” at this point…on both sides of the aisle).

The flip side of one of these pleas is that not every officer in blue is guilty of either racial profiling or brutality; I know quite a few who were just as outraged that George Floyd was not let up from under a knee when he said he couldn’t breathe. There were even some police units that marched with Black Lives Matter protestors this past summer in a show of solidarity.

Every member of the Muslim community is NOT responsible for 9/11, nor do they want to kill everyone who believes differently from them. Instead, our Muslim brethren are typically warm and caring individuals who came to these shores for the same reasons other immigrants came here. Get to know them, lose the fear bred by ignorance.

Yes, the Holocaust really happened and over 6 million of our Jewish brethren lost their lives because of Nazi terrorism and evil. Denying it is a slap in the face. Like our Muslim brethren, Jewish people are also typically warm and caring individuals. Get to know them, lose the fear bred by ignorance.

Our Latinx brothers and sisters are NOT taking your jobs. Neither are they “animals” or “vermin”. Most are hard-working and, again, are coming here for many of the same reasons every other immigrant has come to these shores.

This same litany of ignorance and distrust has been perpetuated against every immigrant who has ever graced these shores since Columbus set foot here back in 1492. The only “thieves” in the mix are the earliest settlers to these United States who called our First Nations’ brothers and sisters “heathens” and “savages”, accused them of being “animals” and “murderers”, forced them off their lands and onto reservations, tried to wipe away every trace of Native American heritage, and sold many to the Caribbean as slaves.

On the issue of slavery, yes, we do have much in the way of reparations to our Black brothers and sisters to give. I have no doubt some of these families would have found their way to these shores like every other immigrant if left to do so freely. However, most did not come here freely. And, because these “immigrants” came here as chattel, even tracing their lineage is more challenging than for any other demographic of people. Like our Jewish brethren who lost so much during the Holocaust, it is a slap in the face to all of the men, women, and children who lost their lives to that “peculiar institution,” and to the myriad hate crimes that have dogged their steps ever since.

Going back to immigration, it hasn’t only been people of color who have experienced hate and violence at the hands of those U.S. citizens who came here before them. In the 1840s, the doors and windows to nearly every business held a sign that said: “Irish need not apply” or “No Irish”. That is until factory owners realized they could hire two young Irish girls for less than they paid the skilled American worker…and fired the latter. I could be wrong, but I believe that was one of the earliest episodes of an immigrant being reportedly “taking our jobs”.

The truth of it all is that our country has progressively become the richer for every wave of immigrants that have come to these shores. Don’t believe me? Take a look at the list of holidays I neglected to celebrate. We have Catholic, Protestant, Muslim and Wiccan holidays listed. Irish, Italian, Black, and Asian celebrations, too. In a couple of weeks it will be Easter (Christian), Passover (Jewish), and Ramadan (Muslim). And Cinco de Mayo is just around the corner.

Where else in the world can you find such diversity? We not only bleed the same, we bleed together when we cannot love our neighbors as ourselves.

May God bless you & keep you!

Bereavement, Brothers & Sisters, Christianity, Compassion, Faith, Family, Friendship, Grief, Love, Memories, Nostalgia

The Cycles of Life

Lisa Burbank

“And now, dear brothers, I want you to know what happens to a Christian when he dies so that when it happens, you will not be full of sorrow, as those are who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and then came back to life again, we can also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him all the Christians who have died.” (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14)

My heart is heavy yet again.

Snow is drifting and blowing about outside my window. There’s at least 10-12 inches on the ground, more still falling, and a prediction of up to 20 inches before it is done. Usually my heart delights like a little kid over a big snowfall like this. Instead, I keep thinking of a childhood friend: Paul “Peewee” Shelton.

Paul’s family rented the apartment above my family’s in St. Louis, Missouri about a year after we moved there in 1979. We were neighbors and friends for a number of years afterwards; have remained friends forever since. I went to school with his older brothers. His niece, Amey, played with my baby brother, Shaun. Our families went to Six Flags together and I saw my first concert–Johnny and June Carter Cash–with them at Six Flags. Our mothers became the best of friends, their birthdays a day apart, and every night (weather permitting, of course) like clockwork, the two of them would sit outside together on the stoop and chat about everything under the sun. They were like family.

They were family.

And always will be in my heart.

So that heart broke a little last night to learn that the youngest passed away yesterday. He’s younger than me. That just seems off balance for some reason. It’s hard for me to credit him as being 50-something (I’m 54; he was 2-3 years’ younger). I still see the gangly string bean of a boy who teased me throughout my teen years. I’m also reminded of a time–I’m not even sure how old we all were–but Peewee, as he was known then, had broken a window. It was an accident but, he was sure he was going to catch hell for it. He ran off and hid. When his mother got home I went looking for him. I found him sitting on the retainer wall by the basement door. He was still working off the mad, or fear, and told me to get out of there. I braved the mad to let him know she had said he wasn’t in trouble; she knew it was an accident. My heart went out to him in that moment of time. I’m guessing he was maybe 12 or 13. Later, he dumped the “Peewee” nickname, but I had to translate for Mom when I told her last night; she never knew his first name was Paul. He was always Peewee to her. She also caught herself thinking of him as that youngster, too; long distance will do that.

It sucks having loved ones scattered all over the country. One of the drawbacks of homesteading, or farming, is not being able to travel as readily as others; your animals always need care. I don’t begrudge it; they are God’s gift to me on this earth and they keep me going. But, when something like this happens, I wish I lived closer to hold a hand, to cook a meal for his siblings, to help them in whatever way I can to get through this hardship. They were always there for us when we were neighbors; it would be nice to return the love.

The best thing I can do from this distance is pray: for Paul, for his family, for everyone who loved and knew him…and at least offer my ear if they need to talk to someone who shares at least a little of their pain.

Rest in Peace, Paul Shelton…we will meet again. May God bless you & keep you! Love you always, my old friend!

Books, Christianity, Creativity, Enlightenment, Faith, God/Jesus, Gratitude, Healing, Memories, Music, Nostalgia, Open-mindedness, Rock & Roll, Self-esteem, Self-improvement, Social Media, YouTube

Another Chapter

Lisa Burbank

“A merry doeth good like a medicine, but a broken spirit makes one sick” (Proverbs 17:22)

I turned 54 the Friday before Thanksgiving. I started my day with a cuppa tea and a steady stream of Weird Al Yankovic videos from YouTube.

Odd.

No, I wasn’t jonesing because, as I grow ever deeper into my 50s, I cannot help but grow more aware of things like aging and mortality………

Okay.

Maybe just a little.

But who couldn’t use a little humor on their birthday?

And, if I’m really being honest, I’ve always had a “thing” for Weird Al. He’s my brand of sexy. And, as he was a bachelor for quite a number of years, well, he’s not now, but hope bloomed steady in this heart for those numbers of years (chuckle). As if…

Sigh.

No, I’m not jonesing that he’s been a seemingly happily married man for some time now. I wish he and the Mrs. many more happy years. If I had to analyze my musical choices on the birthday, I would say, if any jonesing, it was the trip down memory lane that many of his videos evoked: Donny Osmond, Florence Henderson, Michael Jackson…so many of the icons of my youth grace his videos, or inspired them. So much so that the real jonesing flourished alongside the chuckles over his cleverly written, tongue-in-cheek lyrics.

Damn. I’m getting old.

Eventually I turned off the TV and headed upstairs to spend some much-needed time with my characters. And there I stayed, hacking out another chapter in the literary desert, praying that with God’s grace, this book will be one of many. Perhaps someday another individual will read a few chapters on their 54th birthday and feel some of the same emotions as I did watching Weird Al’s videos: hope, humor, awe, humility, nostalgia, and yes, even some low-key depression.

In the meantime, I have continued to ponder life. I’ve been looking back over the years. Seeing all that I’ve done, all that I’ve accomplished…at least in terms of academics. It’s time to put to use the college degree, the myriad certifications, and live the life of my dreams. There is no room in the heart of the faithful for fear. And I’ve allowed it to take root and stay.

Time to clean house.

Looks like my birthday spent with Weird Al had a bit of a cathartic effect, too. Here’s to another 54 years, give or take, and a merry heart finally ready to follow the path that God has been nudging me towards before it’s too late.

What dreams are you holding in your heart but too afraid to follow? Time to clean house and give the adversary the boot.

May God bless you & keep you!

Animals, Art, Books, Christianity, Climate Change, Creativity, Environment, Exhaustion, Faith, Fiber Arts, gardening, Global Warming, God/Jesus, Heavy Metal Music, Herbs, Holistic Health, Homesteading, Memories, Music, Plants, Poverty, Social Media, Spinning, Straw Braiding, Weaving, Writing, Yoga & Fitness, YouTube

Which Way Do We Go, Which Way Do We Go?

Lisa Burbank

Rest in the Lord; wait patiently for Him to act. Don’t be envious of evil men who prosper. (Psalms 37:7)

Scatter Syndrome (skah’ ter sin drohm) 1. The inability to focus on that one thing owing to the over-eagerness of having so many options. 2. When the mind leaps from one option or opportunity to the next like a squirrel leaping from branch to branch in a tree. 3. The anxiety and subsequent exhaustion that results from considering too many of those options at once to the point of being overwhelmed and then getting absolutely NOTHING done so you crawl off feeling like a failure again. 4. All of the above.

No, I don’t believe that’s really a term. And I can’t claim I just made it up either because I got it from a friend. However, I’d like to think I’m at least one of the first to formally give it a potential dictionary meaning.

Now that I’ve graduated college with a Bachelor’s of Art in Creative Writing with an Emphasis on Fictional Writing, the world, supposedly, is at my feet. At least that’s what all the recruiters tell you as you sign the agreement at said university. In addition to a multitude of creative writing workshops, grammar and composition, literature, poetry and linguistics, I studied grant writing, business writing, entrepreneurship, art, advertising, and, of course, environmental science. This last encompassed the bulk of my electives.

So, where do I go now?

Of course, my main objective is to finish my book. But, in the meantime, I’m thinking I need to focus on some other aspects of writing, such as short stories, articles, etc. that I can finish quickly and send off to a potential editor for publication. I’m trying to focus on my writing as a business as much as an art. Though I’m leaning more towards self-publishing where my book is concerned, I would like to get my name out there. And, who knows? Maybe, in time, I’ll land a publishing deal after all.

Get an agent.

That was a steady stream of advise from nearly every college professor. But, as someone who is staring down the road to foreclosure right now (I’m behind more than the amount for which the Go Fund Me campaign was created), paying said agent would be next to impossible.

Then there is the zoning issue that I’ve recently come up against so that even if I could get right-side up on the mortgage, I would have to forfeit the heart of this homestead (the animals who share it with me) in order to stay. The attorney I consulted with over a decade ago–before I brought home my first dozen chicks and ducklings–either gave me some bad advise, or this new neighbor is throwing his weight around at the town hall. The attorney costs money, too. As does relocation. So, some of that scatter syndrome probably stems from the pressure to produce and succeed in a hurry. And it doesn’t help that his wife hides in the bushes bordering our two properties, craning her neck for…something? Gladys Kravitz has reincarnated. Maybe it’s time to twitch my nose and find my inner Samantha Stevens.

Financial challenges aside, yes, I do want to focus on my book, on my writing, first and foremost. But there’s also the homesteading and prepping that started years ago and all the myriad directions that I’d love to take it. There’s the original premise for The Herbal Hare: a business producing herbal, apian, and hand-spun/woven fiber products. There’s a second-hand spinning wheel downstairs that needs some TLC to get it moving again. It’s not the Walking/Great Wheel that I learned on and dream of owning, but it has potential…even if I do not have the fiber-producing animals yet. A loom and loom tool (smaller spinning wheel used for filling bobbins for the shuttle) are beyond me right now, but definitely hovering on the radar. There’s a shed full of bee equipment gathering dust. And dozens of seed packets and catalogs to plant that extensive herb garden for making those herbal products, selling plants and seeds, and teaching workshops on herbs. I’m even considering a YouTube channel for the same. I’d like to add some microgreens and sprouts to the list in time. There are visions of a market garden down the road. And a small garden patch planted with rye for drying and braiding the straw for making hats–a skill I never would have guessed at, a gift from my time in living history. As is the interest in lace making, which I have also tried and proven to have some proficiency in producing.

There’s an easel gathering dust. And a stack of books checked out from the library, where I currently work part-time, focused on drawing and art. There’s a guitar, amp, and Appalachian dulcimer equally dusty. Can I do something with either of those? I have a good voice. I spent over a decade fronting metal bands and I’ve served as both a member of our church choir and Lector for many years. (And, damn, if I don’t regret not taking a public speaking class during my tenure at SNHU…if it was even offered via online learning). I’m thinking voiceovers…albeit, that would require equipment I can’t afford at present, another agent, and it would take away much of the energy that I should be focusing on writing.

See? Scatter Syndrome. Twenty different directions to take and continuing to circle back to my true passion: writing, and the very real need to secure home and hearth before too much more time elapses. If this keeps up, I may find myself 90 years old and still circling.

Sigh.

Despite all of this circling, I rearranged the upstairs of my house. I used to have my office in the center bedroom where I painted a mural on the wall depicting a homestead with those fiber-producing animals, an extensive herb garden, lots of bee hives, and me standing triumphant in front of a PC whose screen shouts “BEST SELLER”. As the holistic woo-woo guru, I thought it might aid in manifesting my dreams but, I feel like it has kept me stagnant. The original intent when I painted it was to paint a house that resembled my paternal grandparents’ house, as it will forever be my happy place. I remember my irritation that I couldn’t quite get the roof line correct and, not wanting to wreck something that would forever be displayed on the wall of my house, I left it slightly “off” and continued on. Over the last couple of years since I painted it, I’ve realized that despite the white with black trim color scheme, and the dormer windows, that skewered roof line is this roof line…as is the positioning of the barn with my current barn. If it wasn’t for the new neighbor, I could have this dream here. There’s room enough. But alas…

Another sigh.

So, I’ve moved the office. And there’s a white board awaiting it’s first assignment in getting that much closer to my dreams…once I kick ol’ Scatter Syndrome to the curb and discipline that focus in its place.

May God bless you & keep you!

Animal Rights, Animals, Bereavement, Birthday Wishes, Christianity, ecosystems, Emergency Preparedness, Environment, Exhaustion, Faith, Family, gardening, God/Jesus, Grief, Herbs, Homesteading, Love, Memories, Reflexology

A Weary Heart

Lisa Burbank

“I will lie down in peace and sleep, for though I am alone, O Lord, You will keep me safe” (Psalms 4:8)

I turned 54 yesterday.

I woke up this morning to find another beloved feline had passed away overnight. No sign of illness or injury, but her son, Alice Cooper, died of a heart defect when he was a little over a year old–on November 22, 2016; his mama left either late November 20, or early November 21, 2020, almost 4 years to the day. Perhaps Mama Priscilla had a heart defect, too.

Priscilla was a very pregnant stray dropped off here 5 years’ ago. Mom and I kept all three surviving kittens, Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper and Emmylou Harris, got everyone spayed/neutered and they have all been a joy. It broke my heart to find Priscilla lying on the floor of the rabbit room. I wondered where she was last night when I went to bed. Usually she gets up on the bed for her nightly cuddle, rubbing her cheek as tightly against mine as she can possibly get it. I assumed there was a mouse brave enough to visit a home with 9 resident felines. Now I wonder if she was already gone by the time I went to bed. Not the most auspicious way to begin your 55th year of life.

Caught the next door neighbor–the same one who challenged zoning back in June and July–hiding in the bushes bordering our properties last week, craning her neck over the stone wall looking for…something. When we pulled up in front of the house to turn into the drive, she had the startled-deer-in-the-headlights look when she realized we were home and had seen her. She left rather quickly.

Mom smokes. When she goes outside at night for a cigarette, if the outside light pops on because she’s walked in front of the motion sensor, someone in this neighbor’s house walks over to the upstairs window and stands there, watching. What are they hoping to see? What is it about us that they find so fascinating? It’s a fixer-upper home. It didn’t have curb appeal when it was up on the market in 2004. It’s definitely gotten worse over the last 16 years. And, though my Mom is an attractive 74 year old, she’s still 74 years old. What do they care if their elderly neighbor sits outside at night?

It’s going to be hard leaving here…well, it would be if not for these neighbors. Perhaps that is His plan to break the sentimental hold this home has on me. 5 dogs, 11 cats, 1 goat, 3 guinea pigs, 1 pet rat, 3 parakeets, 20 rabbits, 4 ducks and 29 chickens have their final resting place in the pet cemetery out back. I kept a reflexology practice here; have planted trees and shrubs, fruits, vegetables, flowers and herbs; learned how to can food, bake bread from scratch and a host of other homesteading skills here. More importantly, I’ve shared a lot of laughter and tears, both good memories and bad, and a whole lot of loving within these four walls…even if the roof does leak and a host of other updates need attending.

But I’m leaving.

The remaining goats, chickens and ducks probably qualify for contraband these days since the nosy neighbors raised a stink. I’ve had some acquaintances suggest contacting Legal Aid to see if there’s help with the zoning issues–help that I engaged long before any farm animals arrived–but I’m thinking, while I may inquire, the biggest part of me is tired of the struggle. The mortgage is high, the repairs many and costly, and the job market in this area is one of the worst. The zoning issue is the straw that broke the camel’s back.

It won’t be easy. I’m looking to homestead, as I had been doing here, but I’m looking to do it on a larger scale. Not necessarily a larger property but a greater attention to self-sufficiency and environmental protection. So that will mean unrestricted use. Land only…to start with.

Even that little bit is daunting to this weary heart. But to give up is inconceivable. I’m getting too old for nosy neighbors and their drama, or living a life that barely scrabbles by rather than living a life that will bring me joy and a sense of security that will be the first I have ever known since I was a very wee child. A life lived with intention and a sense of purpose. It is too short, as Priscilla’s minute time on this earth has reinforced yet again, to waste it on drama and stress.

May God bless you & keep you!